


Two hours and seventeen minutes

by asamandra



Category: Marvel, The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: Broken Hearts, M/M, Pre-Avengers (2012), Rumors, Secret Relationship
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-09-09
Updated: 2013-09-09
Packaged: 2017-12-26 03:15:43
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,826
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/960943
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/asamandra/pseuds/asamandra
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>It was probably the fastest rumor that ever made it's way through all SHIELD-bases around the world.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Two hours and seventeen minutes

It was probably the fastest rumor that ever made it's way through all SHIELD-bases around the world. It needed exactly two hours and seventeen minutes and each Agent knew it: Phil Coulson, yes, that boring, balding and ordinary paper pusher Phil Coulson, is banging Hawkeye! 

 

**It is believed that it started this way:**

_The quinjet waited on the runway when Hawkeye, the Black Widow and Phil Coulson came out. Coulson talked to both his assets, handed them folders and when they entered the aircraft, he said 'Be careful'. The younger man smiled and touched his lower lip with his index finger for a short second before he sat down and buckled up. Coulson smiled, when he saw the gesture._

 

**Three minutes later, Washington DC base, locker room:**

“You won't believe what I've just heard.” Mike said and grinned at Jodie.

“You up to share your wisdom with the ragtag?” Jodie mocked and sat down at the bench between the lockers. Range practice got canceled, the instructor had to go on a mission.

“Hawkeye is involved with someone.”

“And why should that be of interest?” She said and slammed her locker shut, with one last glance at the picture of the guy she had taped on the inside of it. 

“I know that you have the hots for the guy. But apparently he also has the hots for guys.” Jodie could hear the malicious grin in his voice.

“You want to tell me...” she glared at Mike now.

“... that your precious Agent Barton gets it up the ass. And apparently it's Coulson.”

“How do you know?” Jodie asked now.

“Gordon has seen them out on the airfield.” She heard him close his locker and then he came around, put his foot at the bench and still smirked. “He said, Barton blew a kiss to Coulson before the jet left.” 

“That's bull and you know it. No one would be this unprofessional.” Jodie snorted.

“That's what I've heard.” Mike shrugged, grabbed his bag and left.

 

 

**Eleven minutes later, Chicago base, cafeteria:**

“Dani, you want to come over?” Melanie waved when she saw her friend looking for a seat. Danielle smiled and flopped down, placed her tray in front of her and just wanted to start to eat when her cell beeped. 

“Holy mother of god!” she blurted out when she read the text message. 

“Something happened?” Mel asked and furrowed her brows when she carefully took her first bite of mystery meat three. She was still sure meat shouldn't be orange.

“I've just got a message from Carlton. You know, the guy I was together with during basic training. He works at the base in Houston, Texas, now.”

“Okay.”

“You know Phil Coulson?” Dani asked and Mel nodded.

“Yeah, that guy was here a few weeks ago, wasn't he?” 

“Yes, that guy. Did you know that he is together with Barton?”

“Barton as in Agent 'Hotguy' Barton?” 

“You mean Hawkeye.” Dani smirked.

“That was, what I've said.” 

“Barton is into guys?” 

“Barton is into Coulson!” 

“Oh my god. I need to text Sam. She so has the hots for the guy.” Both women took their cells and typed text messages.

 

**Nineteen minutes later, Helicarrier, bridge:**

“Hill! My office!” Fury bellowed when he entered. Maria Hill turned, nodded at Cragen that he should take care of the bridge as long as she was gone. 

“What do you know about Coulson and Barton?” Martin could hear Tom ask before Hill closed the door. 

“Coulson and Barton?” He looked in his direction but Martin could only shrug.

“It's true then?” John whispered when Cragen looked in the other direction.

“What do you mean?” Martin asked quietly.

“I've got a message from a friend. He is stationed in Seattle. He said, one of the pilots told him that Coulson and Barton are together.” 

“Together? As in _together_ together?” Tom asked and seemed slightly disgusted.

“Aaron said, this pilot saw Barton kiss Coulson on the airfield before he had to leave for a mission.” John confirmed.

“Never thought that paper pusher had it in him.” Martin chuckled.

“Morrison, Jones, McKay! This is not your coffee party!” Fury snapped behind them and all three concentrated on their work again. No one saw Nelson, the guy who most of his time played Galaga, update his 'secret' blog on SHIELD's Intranet.

 

 

**Thirty-three minutes later, Tokyo (Japan) base, garage:**

“Masa? You here?” Darren yelled over the noises. He looked around and then he found the younger man under one of the new SUV's with his mp3-player on.

“Masa!” He kicked his foot and the guy cursed in Japanese. But then he moved his creeper and came out from under the car. He pulled out the earbuds and stared at Darren.

“You've lost!” he grinned and Masa only lifted one brow. 

“What are you talking about?” He asked and reached for a rag to clean his hands.

“I've been right.” Darren still grinned.

“Can you please come to the point? I can't follow you.” Masa finally sighed.

“The bet. You remember the bet? You owe me, babe!”

“ _This_ bet?” 

“Yes, this bet.” Darren's grin got even broader. 

“The fuck.” Masa muttered and that was really unusual. “The proof?”

“It's in the Intranet. Confirmed by Fury himself.” The young Japanese sighed once again, took his wallet and handed his colleague hundred dollar.

“Did they say with whom?” He then asked.

“Apparently it's Phil Coulson.” And now Masa's brows hit his hairline.

“Coulson? That suit? Mr. Phil 'Your report is incomplete' Coulson?” 

“Exactly.” 

“Wow.” Masa shook his head and then went back to his work. This bet has been a bad idea.

 

 

**Forty-nine minutes later, London (Greatbritain) base, car park:**

“Jacqueline, hi,” the woman said when she spotted the other woman stepping out of her car.

“Hi Lacey. Same shift like me today?” She grabbed her bag and wanted to go to the office building.

“Yes. Say, does Elsa still work in your office?” Lacey asked and shouldered her rucksack when she walked up to Jacqueline.

“Sure, why do you ask?” 

“There's some rumor I've heard.”

“About Elsa?” Jacqueline asked and her brows raised.

“No, about her crush.” Lacey grinned evilly and took her mobile to show the other woman the message. “Margret wrote me, she crushes a little bit herself. She said, someone from the Moscow base told her.” 

“Wow, and there I always thought Hawkeye is straight like an arrow.” 

Both women looked at each other and started to laugh.

 

 

**Sixty-three minutes later, Johannesburg (South Africa) base, gym:**

“Hey Belinda, long time no see.” Karen said when she stepped on the elliptical machine beside the Senior Agent.

“Yeah, came back from an assignment in Sebokeng this morning.” Belinda pulled out her earbuds and turned off the mp3-player.

“How did it go?” 

“Mostly boring. That asshole let us wait two weeks and then all was over in a few minutes. Need to work off some stress now. They hadn't had a gym in the hellhole they called hotel. And we couldn't move to another location because the damn McBride didn't call.”

“Wow, that really sucks.” Karen nodded sympathetic. 

“And here? Please tell me that here something interesting happened.” 

“No. Wait, yes! I just got a message from Bobby, you know, the guy they transferred to Frankfurt, Germany, last year. You won't believe what he told me.”

“Spit it. I'm up to believe everything right now.” Belinda smirked.

“Phil Coulson is banging the hottest piece of ass running around SHIELD.” 

“What? Romanov?” She asked wide-eyed and forgot her training.

“What? No. No! Hawkeye!” Karen was puzzled at first but then she remembered that Belinda had a small crush on the Russian since she met her two years ago.

“You kidding?” Belinda stared now. 

“No. I've heard they were caught making out in the showers.”

“Coulson? And... and Barton? No way!” Belinda shook her head.

“I couldn't believe it myself but Bobby said his source is credible.”

“But... Coulson? He's what? Fifty. And he's by far the most boring guy. _He_ and Barton?” 

“No one could believe it, but they were caught in the act.” Karen shrugged now.

“Fuck, I need to call Jonas. His girlfriend works on the Carrier.” And with her towel around her neck Belinda left the gym.

 

 

**Eighty-five minutes later, Buenos Aires (Argentina) base, office:**

“Hey, Fernando. I have good and bad news for you.” The girl grinned when she sat down at his desk.

“What do you want, Betty?” Fernando sighed and leaned back. 

“I have good and bad news. Which one do you want to hear first?” Betty asked and smirked evilly. 

“I don't have time for your shit.” He wanted to turn back to the file he just worked on.

“No, really. It's... believe me, you want to know that.” 

“Okay, then. Whatever. Tell me.” 

“Which one. The good or the bad news?” 

“The good one.” He removed his glasses and pinched the bridge of his nose.

“Apparently you've been right the whole time.” She grinned brightly.

“I've been right. That's good. And now I have work to do.” 

“No, ask me what you've been right with.” 

“Betty, please...” 

“Okay, okay... I'll tell you. You've said that Hawkeye is gay and apparently you've been right.” 

“Really?” Fernando looked up and only someone who knew him could hear the tiny hint of hope in his voice. He had a massive crush on the guy since he was here last year to zap Martenio. “That's good, isn't it?” He asked but now he could see the evil streak around Betty's mouth.

“But Romain from the base in Lyon, France, said, that he gets it up the ass from Phil Coulson.”

“And how does Romain know that?” Fernando asked, finally interested.

“Romain's brother-in-law is at the L.A. base and there they say, that they got caught in the act.”

“You mean... while they...” 

“Romain said it was Maria Hill who caught them. In the showers at Washington DC base.”

“Phil Coulson you've said.” 

“Yes.” Betty nodded and snatched one of Fernando's lollipops from his desk.

“But... but... that guy doesn't even have hair?” 

“Maybe next time he's here you can take your chance.” Betty grinned, patted Fernando's cheek and then she left.

 

 

**Ninety-nine minutes later, Moyobamba (Peru) outpost, MASH:**

“Agent O'Hare, how are you?” Dr. Müller asked and looked at her only patient.

“Could be better.” Tommy said and grinned. 

“Tomorrow you can go back to work. It's... it's okay.” She said and wrapped up his injured arm again.

“Kathrin? You in here?” they both heard Sandra call.

“Yes, I'm here.” The young doctor said and smiled at Tommy. 

“You up for some rumors?” Sandra asked when she came in.

“Rumors?” Kathrin furrowed her brows.

“Yes, rumors. You know... Barney just got the internet connection repaired and... you know... Galaga Guy's blog on the Intranet?” 

“That guy tells shit the whole day, why do you even bother?” Kathrin said and turned but apparently Agent O'Hare was interested as well.

“So, you want to know the newest gossip from civilization?” 

“Yeah, well... whatever. Spill it.” 

“You know Agent Barton?” Sandra asked and now Tommy chuckled.

“Agent Hot guy?” he said and both, he and Sandra, grinned broadly.

“Yes, I know him. He was my weapons instructor before I could go out into the field.” Kathrin said and blushed. Sandra knew, that she thought Barton is hot.

“Galaga Guy wrote that he's now together with one of the top dogs.” 

“What do you mean?” Kathrin asked and lifted one brow.

“Coulson.” She whispered and Tommy's eyes went wide. 

“No way!” He breathed. “Coulson? That robot?” 

“What? Robot? What?” Kathrin was confused. She'd heard of Phil Coulson, Fury's third in command, who hadn't heard of him. “Why robot?”

“No one is sure that the guy is human. He never show's any emotions.” Tommy explained.

“Well, apparently now he showed some. He banged Agent Hot guy.” Sandra smirked.

“That's gross.” Kathrin said and left the tent. She shook her head when she heard Sandra and O'Hare still chatter about Coulson and Barton.

 

 

**Hundred and eight minutes later, Anchorage (Alaska) base, Loading bay:**

“Where's Cherry?” Marvin asked when he saw Agent Byers in the loading bay.

“She's in the office. She has a cold and I said I can accept the delivery.” 

“Oh. Okay.” Marvin said and nodded.

“Why do you ask?” 

“It's... nah, it's not important.”

“Okay, tell me.” Byers said now.

“It's only gossip.” And now Byers nodded. He knew how much Agent McGuinness loved gossiping.

“I can tell her, if you want me to.” He offered and Marvin wasn't sure.

“I don't know.” 

“It's something about Agent Barton?” Byers made a guess. Everyone knew that Cherry had a massive crush on the much younger Agent since he was here for a mission three years ago. She even had paid a horrible sum for a nude photo she tried to hide in her desk. No one ever asked who made this photo and how Cherry of all people got one, but she had it and whenever she thought herself alone she looked at it. 

“Yeah. On my way over here I've talked to my brother Louis. He's currently at the San Diego base and there some rumors made the round.” 

“About Barton.” 

“Yes. It's said, that he's now together with that accountant guy, Coulson.” Byers nearly choked. No one who really knew Coulson would call him accountant, or at least, no one who'd been out in the field with him. 

“You mean... Phil Coulson, _this_ Phil Coulson is... you know... with Barton?” 

“Yes, that's what Louis told me.” 

“But Barton? I mean, Coulson is a classy dude? Why would he... you know... be with someone who screwed anything with a heartbeat?” Byers was shocked now.

“Just saying.” Marvin shrugged and opened his truck.

 

 

**Hundred and nineteen minutes later, Shanghai (PRC) secret base, mess hall:**

“Really?... You kidding!... No, that's... really?... Come on, Darcy, that has to be... Fury, really?... Fuck! No, really, Fuck!... Thanks for calling.” Lisa quit the call and then stared at her cell.

“Lisa, everything okay?” Jean asked and took her hand.

“No... nothing is okay.” 

“If I had to guess I'd say it's about Barton.” Jean said and raised one brow questioningly.

“Darcy... you know her... she's weapons instructor at Miami base...”

“Yes, I know her.” 

“She said, that... that...” 

“Lisa, calm down and tell me what happened.” 

“He was so nice when he was here and he said... he said that he liked the way I wear my hair... and he said that he looks forward to meet me again...” 

Jean lifted her brow. Two months ago Agents Barton and Romanov had been here and since then Lisa had sort of a unhealthy crush on Barton. 

“And now... now he screws around with a guy... with Coulson of all people?” Her voice was really loud right now and the other people looked in their direction. 

“Come on, Lisa, let's go.” 

“I've waited for him!” She yelled. “He told me he would come back soon!” 

“Lisa, please, calm down.” Jean tried again.

“And then this asshole lets himself get caught with Coulson's dick up his ass!” Jean saw Agent Markov come over to them. 

“Lisa, please.”

“Is everything okay?” Markov asked when he was with them. 

“No, I don't think so.” Jean said and shook her head. 

“What did that fucker think? That I'm gonna wait forever? And he screws around with that paper pusher!” Lisa yelled now and Markov waved someone over. Jean recognized Dr. Chen and the man opened his doctor's bag, took a syringe and drew up something and when Lisa started to scream again, Markov held her and Chen gave her the shot. 

“What was that?” Markov asked when Chen and Lisa were finally gone. 

“I'm not sure. Apparently her _crush_ screwed around with a guy.” Jean said and Markov nodded.

“Barton?” He asked.

“You know that?”

“Everyone knows that by now.” He said and smiled.

 

 

**Hundred and thirty-seven minutes later, Mexico City (Mexico) base, airfield:**

As soon as the quinjet hit the tarmac the pilot lowered the ramp. Barton, Romanov, Sitwell, Jones, Bomer and Smith left the aircraft. Barton, with shades on and his bow case in hand walked beside Romanov when they spotted Agent Ruiz waiting for them. 

“Agents Barton, Romanov. Pleasure to have you here.” Ruiz said and smiled. 

“Since when are you this formal, Marco?” Clint asked and looked over the rim of his shades but when he saw the other Agent throw a nervous glance in Natasha's direction the woman sighed and went over to the waiting Agents. 

“You know the mission objectives, I guess.” Ruiz asked and Clint lifted one brow. “Hey, just asking.” He smirked then. 

“Marco, this is not my first rodeo.” Clint said and raised one brow when Ruiz looked at him questioningly.

“The fuck is wrong? Did I grow a second head?” He finally asked. 

“No... it's... is it true?” Marco couldn't hold back any longer.

“Context?” Clint huffed and removed his shades.

“Uhm... you and Coulson... is it true?” Clint gestured with his hands for Ruiz to continue. “It's... I've heard Fury caught you and him in the showers...” 

“In the showers.” Clint frowned. 

“Yeah, you know... screwing around.” 

“What?” Clint stopped and stared at the smaller man.

“Hey, just asking. Got a message a few minutes ago.” 

“Who said that?” Clint demanded to know.

“Yeah, well... the message I've got came from Miguel from the outpost in Puente Antiguo but he said, he got it from someone else as well.” 

“The fuck!” Clint grabbed his phone and called Coulson's number. When he saw Marco looking expectantly at him he moved a few steps away, out of hearing range.

“Phil... uhm... I guess we... we have a problem.” Clint said and when he heard the other man sigh he knew that he was in on it as well.

“Yes, that's true. Apparently everyone at SHEILD knows that we...” 

“Got caught by Fury in the showers?” Clint snickered now.

“What? Who said that?” 

“Marco... Ruiz.” 

“But we never...” 

“I know that, Phil.” Clint sighed. 

“Okay. That's weird.” Phil said, then he cleared his throat. “I've talked to Nick half an hour ago. He had heard it, too, but he said, as long as our work isn't affected he will be okay with... you know... us.” 

“Cool! That's... cool.” Clint grinned and then he couldn't resist. “Love you, babe.” He said and quit the call.

Marco still waited for Clint. “We need a conference room and some bunks. We'll stay a few days.” He only said and when he saw the other man waiting for some comments he just smirked, put on his shades, took his bow case and walked over to the building where the rest of his team was waiting.

 

**That's how it really started, ten minutes earlier, Washington DC base, restroom:**

Phil was in the restroom beside the conference room where he just had to brief Barton, Romanov and the rest of the team. They had to fly to Mexico City in a few minutes and he had to stay back this time.

He just washed his hands when his phone rang. Sighing he bend down and looked if he was alone and when he saw no feet in one of the cabins he accepted the call.

“Yes, mom.” He said. He had recognized the number. “No, I will not talk to dad another time... no, I've told him... Mom... Mom, stop please... I've told dad for the umpteenth time, it's either me and Clint or no one... no... what? No!... Mom, I love him... tell dad, if he wants me to come to his birthday then he has to accept Clint as well... no... Mom, I have to go, I'm at work... yes, I love you, too. Bye.” He quit the call and left the restroom. 

It took another three minutes but then one of the stall doors opened. Junior Agent Judd Trump sat there and stared out into the empty restroom. He always sneaked into this room for a smoke because most of the time he was alone in here. But when he heard someone enter he threw his cigarette into the John and lifted his feet that no one could see him here. He wasn't allowed to be on this floor.

“The fuck!” He knew the voice of the guy talking. That was Phil Coulson. He had a course in 'Advanced Tactics' with him but he never heard so much emotion in his voice. Apparently the guy wasn't a robot or a LMD.

Judd opened the door to the corridor the width of a slit and when he saw that no one was outside, he left the restroom. 

As fast as possible he went down to the airfield. He knew his friend Gordon was out there today. When he saw the quinjet take off and Coulson walk back into the building he sneaked out. 

“Hey, Judd.” Gordon came over when he saw him. “You look like you've seen a ghost.” The other guy grinned and patted Judd's shoulder.

“No, but... I guess your assumption that Agent Coulson is a robot or a LMD is wrong.” Judd said and tried to repress a grin.

“Yeah? How comes?” Gordon asked.

“When I tell you something now, this has to stay between you and me, okay?” Judd asked and Gordon nodded. 

“Sure thing.” He said.

“Okay. You know that restroom in the fifth floor? Sometimes I'm there for a smoke, and I've just heard Coulson talk to his mom on the phone. Apparently he has a boyfriend...” 

 

 

**Three days later, Washington DC base, airfield:**

Phil waited for the quinjet to land. He wanted to see if his agents were okay. When the pilot lowered the ramp he could see all of them. No one seemed hurt. Clint just talked to Sitwell and they both laughed while walking down the ramp and over to Phil. 

But then, when Clint was in front of Phil, he put his bow case down, stepped into his personal space, wrapped his left hand around his waist and the right around his neck and kissed him. He pressed his body against Phil's and moaned slightly, when the older man finally responded to the passionate kiss. 

When they broke the kiss, Romanov rolled her eyes, Jasper just grinned and patted Phil's shoulder while passing by.

“What...” Phil started and stared dumbfounded at his younger lover.

“I've thought, when everybody knows there's no need to not do this anymore.” Clint grinned and kissed Phil again. And this time they found a few of the guys looking in their direction, a few wolf whistled but most of them simply ignored them.

“So...” Phil finally cleared his throat, “... how was the mission?” 

“Oh, you know, the usual stuff... we got the data, we rescued the damsel in distress, we killed the evil guy... same same but different.” He grinned.

**Author's Note:**

> [asamandra on tumblr](http://asamandra.tumblr.com/)


End file.
